Friday, September 23, 2011

Will you do friendship with me?

For some people this can be a beautiful question (read GUYS) and for others a nightmare. I am of course in the later class. The probability of the question "will you do friendship with me" is directly proportional to your sex, location and surroundings. There was a movies Mujhse Dosto Karoge but for one it was just a movie and two "Mujhse dosti karoge" atleast is not grammatically incorrect and gross.

I really cannot count on my finger tips and for this case in my mind that how many times have I faced this question. Every time someone stopped me and asks this or every time when when someone left me a note which had this question I could feel my head throwing a set of words out "Friendship happens! Friends are for life! You become friends by knowing each other and you NEVER need to go and ask this question!" I wish I could say this but I know it would have sounded rude and so I had to opt for a lesser rude answer "NO". I believe it is not just my case, there are many sufferers like me who have wished for a better CLASS of suffering.

I understand that by nature's law boys are attracted towards girls and they should understand that even girls are attracted towards guys. The only thing is you will get a response if you are the right opposite and then you would not have to ask for such a silly question.

I just want to say that next time pop the right question or let the circumstances help you out.

Another bugging line after this question is "just friendship only" and all I can think of is "so what else can you". Here you should realise that it is not that a girl is thinking that you will take her advantage as she does not know you and so she said no. She said NO because :
1. She can
2. She can

There are many other ways to ask a person out, to know a person and to become good friends. People should follow those ways then popping this question. If you do not understand this now, you might understand this someday.

Till then , Cheers to beautiful life!

***The reason I could not write a gender neutral blog is my lack of experience about such things happening other way round and thus my lack of understanding.

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Powerful union

I believe that Indians were among the first ones to understand the physical attraction. The beautiful creation where two bodies were created keeping in mind that they are incomplete without each other. I like the Paulo Coelho's explanation which says there that there was just one powerful body and to reduce its power it was cut into two. When these two bodies combine they become immensely powerful. We Indians were aware of this we knew the power of physical attractions and contacts. We have worshipped Shiv lingam for ages and our old temples have carvings which give us proof of ancient erotic ages. We had discovered the secret of happy life. The world's best guide to the art of making love is Kamasutra which was written in India. We had discovered the formula to long , happy, stress free life ages ago. 

Sex is not need. It is natural. It is way of life. It is a part of life. If you run from it or if you are forced to be away from it unknowingly you get frustrated in life. This frustration leads to many other problems in turn. But once you welcome it with open arms and accept it as a natural feeling same as love, affection and hatred your mind becomes calm.

Many who have tried to convey this message have been opposed but that does not change anything. The fact remains.  

Today we can find many articles which say sexercise is good for your body, it makes you stress free and allows the happy hormones to flow and gives your face a glow. But to find peace in sex you need the right person, the right other half who will complete you , who has same urges as you do and who will make you feel complete.  By nature's law you will get attracted towards this right person and the bond will complete you. 

Everyone who says our traditions are against it might have different perception. According to me our ancient and medieval history explains the importance of the most natural feeling. May be we should try and get back to our roots to understand this.

Cheers to beautiful life!

Monday, August 1, 2011

Molestation : what should a child know

Molestation is an ugly word. But still everyone needs to know what it is. Touching and exploiting someone sexually is molestation. A child should always be explained what is the difference between good and bad touch. Along with this if a child complains about a bad touch it should be taken seriously and a steps should be taken against this.

Today I am saying this because I was a victim. A victim of child abuse, a victim of adolescent molestation and it continues. But I can proudly say that I had all the strength to fight this as an adolescent. 

When I was a child I went to see a doctor , a skin specialist for something which had happened on my face. I realised that the behaviour of the doctor was weird and I was at first scared. Then I told my parents and they made me feel it was ok and they just did not complain about this anywhere. The only solution they came to was : not to take me to that doctor anymore. This happened when I was in class 6th. 

Another incident happened when I was in UKG!! My neighbour a guy 6 years older to me, whom I addressed as 'Bhaiya' (brother) insisted in playing s game where he would be my husband : he tried to just touch me, I was terrified and ran away. I told this to his sister but she said I should just shut up and that her brother was mad. 

But I understood one thing , this had nothing to do with my age, my clothes or anything else. It was because of the demon in those men.

Later when someone tried to do something similar I had my answer ready. I had practiced hard, I knew how to hit so hard that any man would fall down bleeding and that is what I have always followed.

I too was a timid girl but I decided to fight and not be scared.

The best you can do is to spread the message and teach your kids what is good and what is bad and support them when they encounter anything bad.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

I am not water... Nor are you...

This happened today.. and I am still thinking... So thought of sharing my thoughts...
While filling my water bottle I looked at the water and thought : The earth is created so beautifully. It has all one can needs to live. Air, water and food. How thoughtful of someone to create all this... The bottle was full by now and I went back to my desk, still looking at the water inside the bottle. It was transparent, odourless, almost tasteless and the most wonderful art was it took the shape of its container. Perfect, I thought.

Shifting my attention from water I realized water is not me and I am not water, am I?? I am a woman. A wanna be woman of substance. A woman living in society. Yes The Society..

Society : Here there are many who expect woman to be Super human. She may work in the office but she has to work at home. She may leave her mother's house and live with the husband's family still there are questions - Does a woman accept her husband's family as hers! Then there are points like a man should prefer a working woman or not! Do women care about there children and husband or are they too career centric! And much more than just this..

But it is water's nature to adjust everywhere and adapt everything not human's. Humans are born with a type of nature. They adapt as much and as long they can. Then why should a women be targeted?

A list of questions never being asked :

Should a working woman marry a working man?

Do working men accept their in-laws as their own parents?

Do working men care about their children, give them enough time?

A woman never poses such questions , they are always by some man who has judged the whole community based on few examples. Just imagine if a woman rated man on the few cases which happen everyday, they will be framed completely negative!!

It is better to understand that every individual is different. The creator created water and he created us. He did not create us like water and water like us.

Lets say it loud and understand it deep.. 'I am not water, You are not water, We are not water'!!

I have shared my thoughts... Now please share your thoughts about this.... :)

Cheers to beautiful life!

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

this can be the result of lack of sex education...

Youngest parents in UK!!!!!!!!!!! AGE 13 yrs!!!!

Two school going kids have become the country’s  youngest  parents. Their baby was born in the last month but the official news of this child birth was announced recently. The two kids are still in school and now have became the youngest parents in the history of UK.
april webster 219x300
The baby born is though healthy and weighs 8lbs 14oz. The name of the mother of the baby born  is April Webster who got pregnant when the baby’s father Nathan Fishbourne were just 13 years in age.
The baby boy has been named Jamie and is currently living with April and her parents. The father of the baby Nathan said that he would love to live with the baby at weekends and the baby can live with April during a week. The two teens had unprotected sex after they started  dating last year in September. The teens are still confused about their  future relationship.

Read more:

understanding is the key..

Everyone on this earth has a need to be felt needed. Yesterday I was on my usual morning walk. I saw a couple. The lady saw three other friends coming and she left her hubby to join them and they sat gossiping. The poor hubby was left behind he managed to run a bit and then sat lonely on a bench with furious expressions.He might be feeling terrible about being left that way. The best support system we can have is our spouse and we are never suppose to make them feel less important. Finally the guy stood up and left. The lady realized only later when her friends also left that she was all alone there. Pity!!
All I want to tell is that understanding is the key of a relationship. You can never ever neglect or make your better half feel less important.If you really need to ask anything related to this or anything that bothers you , you can always get to back to me.  

Thursday, January 20, 2011

sex education!!

Whenever i go through a column titled "ask the sex expert" I feel as if I am going through a column of jokes. Well people in India have minimum knowledge about sex, AIDS and STDs!!

It should start from school:
Parents try to keep their kids away from the opposite gender. It makes them more curious. They end up using porn sites to discover things which were suppose to be taught at the school. Then things go out of hand. They learn all the wrong things there and all the right is left in darkness.

I would recommend the book "Eleven minutes" to all who really want a true understanding.

Instead of regarding it bad or a sin we should look at it in a right way. Love is sacred and so is sex. You should respect it like you respect love.

Harm :

Lack of sex education causes unwanted pregnancy, some stupid people stay away from it always worrying about the results and it can also lead to depression.

Think, understand, and act!!